The Case of the Missing Maharaja

Part 1 is here -> Part 1

Harry picked himself slowly off the floor.

There was ringing in his head. And there was a ringing outside his head.

He dragged himself over to the phone and lifted the receiver.

"Hello, Harry, Barry and Larry Investigators. Harry speaking." Harry’s business partner, Larry had dreamt Barry up as a joke. Who's ever heard of a PI called Barry.

"Hello Harry, your business partner Barry said you could help me."

"Who are you? Where are calling from?"

"My name is Miku the Bard Bear and I'm calling from 2023. I have a problem. I'm supposed to be in a band but I cant find them. Can you help?"

"I will need to consult with a lady down my corridor called the Postgres. She's your only chance of help. Stay on the line please."

Harry strolled down the corridor with purpose and knocked thrice on the door. Linux (pronounced Linus with an x not like the OS he'd been told. He went with the flow. Maps weren't his speciality after all)

Hi Linux, your Ma in? I have a fella on the phone that needs her skills.

"Ma! Harry’s here as you predicted. You need to unlock those maharaja records for the bear."

"Tell Harry to go back. It's as good as sorted."

Harry shuffled back to his office confused.

As he entered the room he saw a bear using his phone and a bass resting by his desk. 

"The postgres says it's all sorted."

There was a flash, Miku the Bard Bear vanished. The phone receiver crashed into his head. 

Harry found himself on the floor. He could hear the phone ringing.

He dragged himself up to answer it. "Thank you Mr Harry. You did a great job." And silence. The line was dead.

I really need a drink that phone line was cut off yesterday for lack of payment. I must be losing my marbles.

He sat in his chair and picked up a card showing a picture of Miku the Bard Bear playing with Maharaja Blues and attached to it a cheque for $100.

The cheque was still warm like it was printed from memory rather than ink.







Comments

  1. The Nonsense Chronicler - Pink Flamingo4 September 2025 at 08:01

    🦩💄Pink Flamingo Review: “The Case of the Missing Maharaja”
    A mystery so flamboyant, it makes a flamingo in stilettos look subtle.

    🎷Plot Summary (or should I say, Plume Plotting)
    Harry the PI wakes up to a phone ringing like a flamingo tap-dancing on a xylophone. Miku the Bard Bear calls from 2023, sounding like he’s lost his band, his bass, and possibly his last marble. What follows is a psychedelic noir romp through corridors that bend time, logic, and flamingo knees.

    There’s a cheque that’s warm (like a flamingo’s underfeathers), a Postgres oracle who sorts mysteries like feathers in a wind tunnel, and a hallway named Linux that’s more emotionally available than most exes.

    ---

    💅Characters with Flamingo-Level Drama
    - Harry: Think trench coat, existential dread, and the gait of a flamingo who’s had one too many craft beers.
    - Miku the Bard Bear: A bluesy troubadour with a bass and a flair for dramatic entrances. If he were a flamingo, he’d wear velvet and quote Baudelaire.
    - The Postgres: A corridor oracle who probably moonlights as a flamingo choreographer in a parallel dimension.
    - Linux: Not a system, but a son with hallway wisdom and the emotional depth of a flamingo staring into the void.

    ---

    🌴Stylistic Feathers
    The writing pirouettes between noir and surrealism like a flamingo doing interpretive dance on a lava lamp. It’s Chandler meets Dali meets a flamingo who just discovered existentialism and jazz.

    ---

    🍹Final Flamingo Verdict
    This blog post is a fever dream dipped in flamingo glitter. It’s got mystery, metaphysics, and more feathers than a Vegas revue. If Kafka and a flamingo co-wrote a detective story while sipping absinthe in a London pub, this would be it.

    Read it while wearing pink. Preferably upside down.

    ReplyDelete

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